Herbs for Grief
By Michelle Polacinski
I want to start this off by saying that there is no quick fix for grief. There is no magic pill, one-size-fits-all cure that is going to make you “feel better” when you are grieving. Grief is a process with no rules, no stages, and no predictability.
The best way to process grief is to allow yourself to feel it as it comes, whether that’s when you’re by yourself, on public transportation, at work, or in the comfort of loved ones.
As we grieve, we feel it in our physical bodies, which can result in chest pain, fatigue, headaches, muscle tension, and a variety of other sensations. That said, plant energies can help work through that grief. Here are some plants that may help:
Hawthorn: Hawthorn is one of my favorite plant medicines. Heart-based, it has been empirically shown to heal cardiac tissue in a variety of studies. However, it can also support a metaphorically “broken” heart. What plants do physically can also support us spiritually, and hawthorn is no exception.
Motherwort: This plant is known as holding a “motherly” supportive energy. A bitter plant found growing along paths in the woods, it’s also a nervine that can help provide support for anxiety and depression, as well as the heart.
Star of Bethlehem: This flower extract is typically used for grief as per Bach’s rescue remedies. It provides comfort for shock and trauma and can also act as a sleep aid.
Lavender: A calming herb, found just about everywhere! Great in a tea or to smell as an essential oil for relaxing the nervous system
Chamomile: Great as a tea or added fresh to a hot bath to reconnect to the body and add a sense of calm.
Lemon Balm: A subtle herb that smells just like lemon, this plant can bring some energy and relief to your nervous system after feeling the fatigue of grief.
Rose: This flower of love can help you reconnect to your heart and your loved ones during this time. It can help you feel supported and keep your heart open.
Valerian: My favorite herb for a nervous system reset, valerian is best taken multiple times a day as a tea or tincture. Make sure to steep it in water that is not actively boiling for approximately 5 to 10 minutes.
Personal plants: If there is a plant that reminds you of your loved one, this can be the greatest medicine for grief. If, for example, you remember the peonies growing in your late grandmother’s garden, having cut peonies in a vase might help you remember her and process the loss.
Grief is hard for everyone. Although losing people is a natural part of life, that doesn’t make it any easier. In this instance, plant allies can help.
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